Chiggers are not just a sport for newbies. Chiggers will take on any and all challengers. They offer great entertainment to young and old. Every spring an annual game of gladiators locked in mortal combat begins. The coliseum is the bedroom and the gladiator is defenseless warrior. If necessity is the mother of invention there is no lacking of innovative "chigger bites treatment" remedies that do not work.
I say the best possible "remedy for chigger bites" is not to get them. But that is not going to happen, so how do you get a "cure for chigger bites"?
First off, it helps to understand the enemy. Chiggers are on the skin. They are not in the skin. They are not borers, but biters. They are not true insects that sting. (Now, isn't that bit of news some worth while information?).
Tip. To repel chiggers tape Bounce drier sheets to your trouser cuffs. You may also want to tape a sheet on each front corner of your truck. It is also a great deer repellent. If you have ants in your house, you can place Bounce around the perimeter of your house.
The plan is to keep chiggers off of your body. Chiggers like to crawl all over the place. As fast as chiggers move, it does take them a while to locate a suitable place to hook on.
IF you are paying attention you just found a clue to chigger bite relief. Since chiggers do not attack immediately like a mosquito, it gives the host (you) a chance to knock the chigger off before he/she starts biting.
Usually those places are in areas where clothes are tight fitting, in moist, dark areas that are warm, but not always. Female chiggers are reported to like the legs and arm pits whereas the male chigger seems to prefer the groin area. Now that sounds familiar.
When you get home, change clothes (preferably someplace where you don't want chiggers to bed down). Get them (chiggers and clothes) into a nice hot wash and yourself into a very hot shower or bath. Preferably a bath with no bleach or other chemicals added. Scrub yourself down with soap and a wash cloth for about 15 minutes or so. You might also want to add water.
If after a few hours you learn you got an invitation by some chigger for lunch, apply some direct heat from a hair dryer for about 2 minutes. Direct the hot air at the bite and keep the heat on for as hot as you can stand without burning. You will get immediate relief, but it may not be permanent. There are little electrical devices that are designed to do that very same thing. There is other more permanent, perfectly natural "remedy for chigger bits".
Obviously some of this article is a bit tongue in cheek. Some of it is not.
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